MangaReview: (AoT) How to Love Yourself as Ymir Does
“We all exist because we were wanted.”- Onyankopon
Spoiler Alert until Chapter 137.
I will also talk about Hunter × Hunter, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion, Golden Kamuy Les Misérables, and Detroit: Become Human. You can avoid it by skipping the “(Spoiler)” part.
If you want to show readers the ideas lying in a character’s mind, sometimes it feels weird for the character to simply tell the readers what they think. As a result, it is a good way to create yet another character as a mirror to reflect the character zieself. In other words, it feels more natural to understand a character by watching zim interacting with another one, especially when there is a conflict of value between them.
This is the same in AoT, there is Levi for Erwin, in The Unknown Soldiers (名も無き兵士), Ch. 80, as I discuss in MangaReview: (AoT) Erwin Smith Could Have Become the Real Demon — the Berserk in Attack on Titan | by 哲學宅 Philosophy Otaku | Mar, 2021 | Medium. Jean acts fundamentally based on Marco, in What Should I Do Now? (今、何をすべきか), Ch. 18, as I discuss in MangaReview: (AoT) What Makes Jean Angry? — The Burden of History | by 哲學宅 Philosophy Otaku | Mar, 2021 | Medium. Gabi gets rid of her hatred and is finally free because of Falco, in Sneak Attack (騙し討ち), Ch. 118, as I discuss in MangaReview: (AoT) Saving Gabi From the Dark Fate — What nation do you belong to? | by 哲學宅 Philosophy Otaku | Mar, 2021 | Medium. You can compare the hell between Eren and Reiner, in Guilty Shadow (疾しき影), Ch. 99 and Declaration of War (宣戦布告), Ch. 100, as I discuss in MangaReview: (AoT) Eren’s Hell, Justifying His Genocide | by 哲學宅 Philosophy Otaku | Mar, 2021 | Medium.
The relationship between Ymir and Historia is no exception. We can not only understand the two, but can also see the idea Isayama wants to tell us by watching them interact with each other. Although their job as a character ends in the middle stage of story, I think it is still worth discussing because of their attracting relationship.
Loving Yourself
The most important turning point of Ymir and Historia is located in Ymir (ユミル), Ch. 40, in which Ymir shows her identity as a titan to save Historia before asking her to live with her real name since then. There is a quotation of Ymir at that time.
“Krista, I used to be like that, too, thinking that it’d have been better if I had never been born. I was hated for the simple fact of my existence in this world. And I died, for the happiness of a great many people. But, there was one thing I wished for with all my heart. If I’m ever given a second chance in life, I want to be able to live only for myself. This was my sincere wish.” Ymir in Ymir(ユミル), Ch. 40
What does Ymir mean by living only for herself? As we see in Meeting (会議), Ch. 89, Ymir is a beggar in her childhood and is found and brought to a cult which worships her as a descendent of the royal family, and thus is named “Ymir” after the ancient deity called Ymir Fritz. However, the cult is discovered and one of the members who brings her in argues that it is Ymir who deceives them. Ymir, then, chooses to keep playing her role, only to be arrested and forcibly turned in to a pure titan.
Why does Ymir decide to keep her role? As we see in Ymir’s memory, this is because of her feeling satisfied for being needed by others. Ymir gets a chance to return to human form by accidently eating Marcel, in Liar (嘘つき), Ch. 95. She decides to live only for herself, until meeting Historia.
What is Historia to her, then? Ymir finds her past self in Historia, as she explains that she is similar with Historia, in Ymir(ユミル), Ch. 40. Historia is the illegitimate child, and is forcibly sent to the training corpse with a fake name Krista. After that, she always acts as a good kid who always shows kindness to others. As Ymir argues in Ymir(ユミル), Ch. 40, however, she in fact wants to risk her life which would be able to earn other’s esteem at the same time. This is why she does not ask for Ymir’s help while trying to save Daz.
Why would Historia become a person like this? Similar with Ymir, she considers herself the one who is not needed by others after being forsaken by her father. This leads to her suicidal personality and eagerness for others’ recognition, and thus she, as Krista, always risks her life helping others, as we can see in Response (応える), Ch. 11, where she volunteers for reinforcement, in One by One (個々), Ch. 15 when she helps Sasha, in Opening the Gate (開門), Ch. 21, where she chooses to join the survey corpse, and in The Titan Forest (巨大樹の森), Ch. 24 when she leads the extra horse to help Armin, Jean, and Reiner.
Ymir knows better than anyone else that acting in favor of others will do nothing good for one’s self. What’s important, then, is to love yourself in a certain way. This is why she cannot turn a blind eye to Historia, because Historia, again, reminds her of her past self, who would do everything only for the love from others. What she wants to do is to inform Historia about the importance of loving herself. By the way, the same issue is outstandingly illustrated in Bystander (傍観者), Ch. 71, in which Eren’s mother tells Keith Shadis that it is already great enough to be born to the world.
Historia receives Ymir’s idea, and decides to live with her real name since then, in Historia (ヒストリア), Ch. 41. She then abandons her personality of kindness, only for Eren to find it more attractive and real, as we can see in their conversation in Location of the Counterattack (反撃の場所), Ch. 54. Well, Eren is considered having to strongest purpose by the instructor. In other words, Eren is the most real person, and that’s probably why he feels the falsity of Krista.
This, then, more or less causes Historia to reject her father’s proposal of inheriting the titan and to decide to save Eren. When she is about to inject the titan serum, considering it her duty, she remembers what Ymir told her and smashes it on the floor. Why? Because obeying the duty means acting for the sake of others. Even if acting in this way will probably gain her father’s love, which she has always been eager for, this is far from loving herself. In addition, Eren at that time suffers from the same feeling as Historia did. He thinks that he should not have been born to the world. This idea is nonetheless what Historia literally wants to argue against, and that’s why she decides to save Eren instead. Here is a quotation from Historia.
“Although I am the enemy of mankind, I am your ally, Eren. I can’t become a good daughter, nor do I want to become a god. However, if there is a crying person who says that he is not needed, I want to go and say that’s simply not the case.” Historia, in Wish (願い), Ch. 66.
This is probably why Eren would consider Historia who saves him, in The Dawn of Humanity (人類の夜明け), Ch. 130. In my opinion, Historia does not only save Eren from death, but more or less also saves him from the abyss of hating himself. Consequently, Eren refuses to take Zeke’s euthanasia plan, in The Dawn of Humanity(人類の夜明け), Ch. 130, because Zeke argues that it is better for Eldians not to be born to the world, in Support (支え), Ch. 115, and Eren knows for sure that this is totally wrong. Well, being saved by the girl who wishes that humanity should be wiped out by titans, it makes sense why Eren starts rumbling lol.
Loving Others
Although Ymir is the one who tells Historia to act for her own interest, in later chapters we can see her acting in the opposite way. For example, she shows the identity of being a titan and risks her life fighting other titans in Historia (ヒストリア), Ch. 41, and tries to avoid destroying the tower which makes her even in more danger. In addition, she tries to perform badly for Historia to have the 10th rank in trainee lives for her to be able to join the military police, in the conversation between Ymir and Historia, in Southwestward (南西へ), Ch. 37. This seems inconsistent in the first place.
However, we can see her probably falling in love with Historia, as she forces Reiner and Bertolt, in Children (子供達), Ch. 47, to try to capture Historia back even if it is apparently too risky. Although Ymir explains to Historia that this is for her own sake, this is probably a lie because she releases Historia after realizing that there is still future in the wall, in Cry (叫び), Ch. 50. From here we know that Ymir really lies to Historia that she always acts for her own sake, in Southwestward (南西へ), Ch. 37.
Well, you might be a supporter for Psychological Egoism and argues that Ymir really acts for her own sake. However, I think there is still a difference between caring about oneself and others. For example, Ymir can choose to take Historia back to Marley to save herself from being eaten by Porco, in Midnight Train (闇夜の列車), Ch. 93. She nevertheless chooses to let Historia go right after realizing the future of the islanders.
This is a salvation for me, because I think Isayama successfully illustrates two kinds of acting in favor of others. You can act for others without caring for your own self. This cannot be considered wrong, though. However, you can also act for others after being able to love yourself. This two are fundamentally different.
In my opinion, this is also why Ymir in the end decides to help Bertolt instead of running away even if she knows she will get eaten. In Someone (誰か), Ch. 48, Bertolt breaks into tears after being questioned by Jean and Connie, begging someone to find them. It is clear that the one who finds them is Ymir, and she decides to try to act for the sake of others in the end.
I sincerely recommend you try to love yourself, even though I also find it really, really hard.
The Importance of Name
Ymir asks Historia to reveal her own name when she reveals her true identity as a titan. I think that here Isayama also wants to tell us the importance of one’s name. Well, similar ideas nowadays often appear in sci-fi (especially cyberpunk) works such as GUNNM (Battle Angel Alita), Ghost in the Shell, Nier: Automata, and Detroit: Become Human, which concern that machines or artificial intelligence being aware of the existence or ego of themselves.
In most cases, these machines probably have their own names even if they already have a code (serial number) as their identity. Why is there a name needed? If a name is used to identify someone, why not simply use easy ones such a number?
This issue has been widely discussed for a long time, and probably most people will agree that name represents one’s identity, and is also the proof that you are yourself. What is the meaning of this, then? Well, let’s see some examples. In Les Misérables, (Spoiler→) Jean Valjean is famous for being called 24601 instead of his real name in his prisoner life (←Spoiler). This is because you are not even considered a human as a prisoner. Name is unnecessary for any non-human. From this perspective, we know that name is also what makes you human being.
In Hunter × Hunter, (Spoiler→) Meruem asks himself what he is while not being able to know his own name, in Charge: Part 1 (突入①), Ch. 261, and finally decides to fight Netero to know his own name, in Name (名前), Ch. 290. In the end of his life, he asks Komugi to say his name one again, in Final Will (遺言), Ch. 318. (←Spoiler) I sincerely recommend you read at least the Chimera Ant arc of Hunter × Hunter, and this is also where I will compare with AoT for a philosophical reason. From this perspective, name is also what makes you alive in the world, and being called by others with your name also proves your existence.
Your name represents your identity, and also proves your existence and makes you alive. This is illustrated pretty well in In Detroit: Become Human, (Spoiler→) if you ever play this game, you will remember that the main character Kara once finds an android with the same type of Alice, and she will then face her most important turning point. She knows that Alice is not human but yet another android called YK 500, and she needs to decide to abandon her or not. The player probably will choose to live with Alice, but this could be used to prove that what Kara needs is not something called YK 500. Instead, what she needs is Alice simpliciter. Alice is not just a name here. It also symbolizes the identity of Alice, and this is exactly what Kara needs.
On the contrary, what Alice needs is undoubtedly Kara instead of any other android of the same type. On the other hand, for Connor, if you choose to act as a machine and finish the job, you will in the end be replaced by another type of machine called RK 900. This is because you are not Connor. Instead, you are nothing more than the type of machine called RK 800, and the existence RK 800 of has nothing to do with the identity of a human being. You are alive only if you have the name called Connor. (←Spoiler)
If you can accept the idea here, you should probably accept the importance of the name of a nation. This kind of ideology is exactly the most fundamental thing here. This is also why In Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion, (Spoiler→) the defeated Japan loses its own name and becomes Area 11, while anyone who fights for freedom will call themselves Japanese. (←Spoiler) In addition, the name of your nation and even yourself can only be called in your own language. This is well illustrated in About My Unfamiliar Father (私の知らない父のこと), Ch. 182 of Golden Kamuy, that (Spoiler→) it is of the first importance for an ethnic to protect their own language and belief. (←Spoiler)
After all, Ymir is not an important character. She does not really have anything to do with the main plot, but only a person who gains the titan power by accident. However, we can see how her idea affects others and even the protagonist. This is one of the reasons why I really love AoT, for even an unimportant support character can be so complicated and attractive.
